Do I Smell the Cork? (And other restaurant wine service etiquette)

 

Do I Smell the Cork? (And other restaurant wine etiquette) 

As everyone's favorite mega pharmaceutical companies begin to distribute their COVID vaccines, I think now is a fantastic time to start longing for a restaurant experience. So, if, like me, you intend to go buy a phat bottle of wine from a restaurant as soon as you're allowed and you're not a sommelier who knows these unnecessary things, here's how to properly do the strange and formal dance that is traditional wine service. Here's a walkthrough of what will happen after you order a bottle of wine and what you should do (as well as debunking some common misconceptions).

When ordering a bottle at a place with an actual sommelier (not just a waiter), there are two things right off the bat that I wanna say. 1) Just be upfront about your budget. No real sommelier is going to try to rip you off, and you make their life way easier if you give them a price range. There's no need to be ashamed about it, chances are your somm drinks $10 bottles when they're by themselves. And 2) if you're lucky and you don't struggle with being embarrassed in social situations, PLEASE don't try to show off for your hot date. Humility will always get you better service...

After you've ordered your bottle, the dance begins. They'll bring out what you ordered and present the bottle to you. At this point, you're checking the label to make sure that it's actually the wine you ordered (waiters/somms have a lot to think about and can make mistakes- it's happened to me). You're also checking that the vintage of the wine is the one you ordered (if you purposefully ordered a certain vintage). Seriously, look, because unless the wine is faulted, this is your last chance to speak up.

Next, the server will open the bottle place the cork in front of you. This is not for you to smell!!! You won't actually be able to get an impression of the wine from smelling the cork, the server does this so you can check to see if the cork is in good condition and that there was no seepage of wine through the cork (something you really need to check if you're buying an older bottle). As you're examining the cork, the server will pour a sample. Traditionally, the oldest male tastes, but many restaurants will now ask who is tasting. With this sample, you are not checking to see if the wine is tasty, you are checking to make sure the wine is not faulted. If the wine is faulted, it'll smell off and will have muted aromas and smell kind of like musty cardboard. If you experience a wine like this, POLITELY ask the somm to confirm for you. Remember it's not their fault if the wine is off, so save your frustration for the producer (please please please). If the wine isn't faulted, you're off to the races. If you just don't like the bottle, sorry, but you kind of already own it... Technically you could send it back if you really really hate it (especially if the somm gave you a crappy suggestion), but it's somewhat of a party foul to send back a perfectly good bottle and pretentious restaurants might not even let you do it. When you've made it through and everything is right, there's only one thing left- enjoy!

The biggest takeaway from all of this is to not be intimidated! I know that's easier said than done... There's already too much mystery and weird cult energy around wine... but just try to have fun when you're ordering something and never ever be afraid to ask questions. Wine people won't ever turn down a chance to talk about wine, and you'll end up getting way more info than you wanted... as you probably have experienced here. :) Happy drinking- I'll be back with the normal blogs next week. In the meantime, enjoy the wonderful stock image below.

bad^

drink what you like,

db